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Dc 02/19/08 E-mail
And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
 
EPHESIANS 6:4 KJV
 
In the course of writing these encouragements over the last few days the Holy Spirit has brought me back to my son, Eric. Eric will be eleven in April. Hard to believe. It has been such a pleasure to watch him grow/to watch his personality develop. As most fathers know, there are times when our children do something/say something and it seems like an echo. An echo of what we did/ how we behaved at that age. Sometimes the echo that comes back can worry us, particularly if we have not fully accepted who we are/where we have been. If there are doubts or worries or regrets about our childhood that have led to doubts about whether or not we are good or worthy we may shudder when we hear our past echo in our children.
 
Eric at times shows much of the sensitivity that first showed itself in me when I was a child. That sensitivity made me different/ made me feel different from my peers but I was unable to see it as a strength. I viewed it as a weakness/ as a disability and believed that the world felt the same way about this part of me. So sometimes my traits echo at me through Eric. At these times my first instinct (not born out of prayer but my first instinct) is often to immediately protect him/ to shield him from the ridicule that I received as a child by encouraging him to not be who he is.
 
This is a trap. In an attempt to keep him safe/ protect him from the indifference or cruelty of others I could be causing him to do the same thing that the off-handed comments of my childhood did. I could be causing Eric to doubt who he is/ to doubt that how God made Him was and is a part of a plan that he may never fully understand and ultimately does not need to understand.
 
As I glance back at the scripture above I am drawn to the word " provoke". Do not get me wrong. Provoking our children is not in and of itself a bad thing. Provoking them to think and analyze and grow closer to God? Yes. Provoking our children to wrath? Look this word up and then see if this is even remotely something you are drawn to do to your children. I know I often mention the necessity of transparency/ of being transparent in our interactions with our Christian brothers. How and when are we transparent with our children? Transparent about what we have and do struggle with?
 
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